HAIR CARE IS HAIR CARE!!


Hiya,
How's everyone doing? Hope fine! Well I am doing alright, last weekend on Saturday I went for a hair event organized by The Kinky Apothecary a natural hair blog, they brought in a Hollywood based natural hair stylist called Felicia Leatherwood.



I got to the event venue just in time for the talk, settled in excitedly and then it started... 'How many ladies here have been natural for at least a year?'- Hands were raised... 'How many of you are transitioning to natural hair?'- A few more hands, then I waited perhaps she would ask how many ladies had relaxed hair...well she didn't! I took that in good stride and ignored the feeling of being an unwanted visitor; maybe it was an oversight because I did get an email sent to my mail box inviting me for the event and surely everyone knows my hair is relaxed and I am loving it!

I listened attentively to everything she said and took notes and was later joined by my pal Bas Bas :)

 Berry of the blog Berry Dakara was sitting right behind me-Lovely to have met you!!


 For the most part I was all there and guess what?!!! EVERYTHING Ms Felicia had to say which I must say was very educative and knowledgeable is EVERYTHING I say, Megz from the famous You tube channel Ulovemegz blog says, the same thing Jen of Just grow already blog says, same thing Lesley of Fresh Lengths blog says, same things said over at African Naturalistas blog and at Curly Nikki's blog-  These are all ladies with beautiful relaxed and natural hair alike!! And it felt good to hear her say these things because it was a validation of all that I talk about on the blog but for some weird reason there seems to be a subtle demarcation being created that gives the impression that achieving healthy and long relaxed hair is an entirely different procedure and in some circles its absolutely unachievable!!

On Saturday I am afraid to say it seemed like I was in such a circle! At one point Ms Felicia stated that relaxers cause cancer! A claim that has no conclusive study. What she said made me do some research and the only link with relaxers and any disease-Uterine Leiomyomata (uterine fibroid-tumors that grow in the uterine) is when women suffer scalp lesions and burns from using hair relaxers and the chemicals seep through their bodies and into their urine !! Meaning that when the relaxing process is done properly, see my post on proper relaxing techniques  HERE and you do not suffer burns or lesions you are free from harms way a point she failed to mention... At the end of the talk a lovely lady called Mo with beautiful curls sitting by me;

 leaned in and said 'I am sure you are wondering why you came, they didn't talk about relaxed hair'...and she was right! Just imagine if I was a curious relaxed lady coming to see what a hair meet up is all about, I'd have left there with the notion that my relaxed hair is not good enough!! Recently I have also been told by l quite a few ladies who just went natural that they did so because they didn't think they could have healthy long relaxed hair... 

So this is my submission- the demarcation is totally unnecessary! Hair Care is hair care whether you are relaxed, natural or otherwise. It is my duty to make this clarification because it is not being made enough, if you moisturize and seal your relaxed/natural hair regularly with the right products, using the right techniques, deep condition your relaxed/natural hair regularly, keep the protein/moisture balance of your relaxed/natural hair, protect the edges and tips of your hair with protective hairstyles-IT WILL GROW HEALTHY AND LONG!! Its that simple- avoid the hype and do what works best for you no matter what choice you make with your hair.

I feel the only major difference between relaxed and natural hair is in the styling-relaxed hair generally has less volume and suffers less frizz while natural hair on the other hand gives you fuller locks to work with but you have to deal with frizz and shrinkage and that's it!! The procedure for actually growing hair and retaining the growth is THE EXACT SAME PROCEDURE no matter the state of your hair- again for more emphasis-The gospel is the same, unfortunately because hair business is big business, propagators of the natural movement have tried to sell a different notion that comes with all these special 'natural products' and tools but don't get carried away, these products are simply hair products and will work for your hair just the way it is!!

I am sorry if I have stepped on a few toes with this post but sometimes some things need to be said, in naming my blog Naija Hair Can Grow, my message is clear and I mean it and encourage all my Naija ladies and all ladies out there who are on the crossroads with their hair to believe that it can grow if you join me on this journey, if you are consistent, if you are using the right tools and techniques NOT simply if you go natural- by all means go natural if you want to have natural hair and prefer your hair that way but please please don't do it simply because you feel that's the ONLY way you will have healthy long hair!!

With these few points of mine I hope I am able to convince you that Naija Hair Can Grow and Hair Care is Hair Care!!! :)

Thanks for the support!!
Xxx
Dabs

82 comments:

  1. Lol @ the end note. You've spoken the truth... Hair care is hair care. I wish they wouldn't start demarcating. Sorry you sorta felt left out at that point. Maybe Felicia needs to be schooled.

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  2. Well, the event was a Natural hair event, so its no surprise they didn't mention anything about relaxed hair and relaxed hair was bashed. I keep up with your posts so I can have something to share with my relaxed friends and family as i'm the only natural in my family. I wish you had more pics. i guess i'll have to go to Kinky Apothecary's site to check them out.
    I even wrote against doing the BC on my blog not too long ago, worth checking out, I'd love to hear your input.
    http://themanecaptain.blogspot.ca/2013/10/doing-big-chop-is-not-always-solution.html

    I think you should continue to hold your meet ups for relaxed ladies, I have never heard of one, may be it's just not popular enough
    you looked pretty :)

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    1. Hiya,
      That's exactly my point, there should be no 'natural hair event' or 'relaxed hair event' because the info is the SAME. My salon day outs are for ALL hair types, naturals and relaxed ladies were at the last salon day out, you can view the pictures and see for yourself. Will check out your post, thanks for the compliment :)

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    2. No need to be petty18 October 2013 at 18:34

      Relaxed hair was not bashed! Perhaps you have a chip on your shoulder resulting in selective hearing?
      Concerns were raised, advise for all hair types was given.

      Just because you wish to post a sensational blog post doesn't mean you must pull down and besmirch an event that we personally found very beneficial for both myself AND MY BEST FRIEND WHO HAS RELAXED HAIR.

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  3. thank's for your information and i like your post

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  4. @The Mane Captain. That's a good idea about the meet-up but maybe it should be open to people with relaxed and natural hair. A forum to promote healthy hair care practices across the board and a safe space where people won't be judged for what they choose to do with their hair.

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    1. Exactly!! My NHCG salon day outs are open to ALL hair types, you can view the pictures from the last one and see, again the info is the same :)

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  5. It was a natural hair event. What were you expecting? LOL

    Anyways I think you should carry on with your salon days out so that the relaxed ladies aren't totally left out.

    But honestly are relaxers totally 100% healthy? #justasking

    Http://itsebunite.wordpress.com

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    1. Hi Ebun don't forget that I WAS INVITED via email for the event so I was expecting a balanced presentation about caring for hair... :) my salon day outs are NOT for relaxed ladies but for all hair types as the pictures from the last will show. Relaxers will harm you if you abuse their use just like every other thing else in the world even food :)

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  6. Yes o, you have been able to convince ME that NAIJA HAIR CAN GROW AND HAIR CARE IS HAIR CARE...
    No vex again oh!
    You look very GOODDDD.

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  7. People should stop making claims that they know nothing about. Research has shown that up to 80% of black women have fibroids, though most are not symptomatic...by the way, your hair is stunning...I've been learning a lot from your blog. Keep it up, as many of us still relax our hair joyfully.

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    1. Such a claim should have conclusive proof before its used so publicly I should think! Thanks for your comment :)

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  8. please we need more relaxed hair meet ups

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    1. The salon day out is not just for relaxed ladies but all hair types are welcome :)

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  9. Dabs don vex o,sorry darling. We women must always find a way to feel superior one way or the other. Hair is hair Jare,I don't have the time to care for natural hair,that's why I relax my hair,does it make ur hair superior? Hell no,who really cares what's on the head of another,what about character? Please allow me to decide how I want to treat my hair,emphasis on MY

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    1. Hee Hee, not vexing at all oh :)

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  10. Hi Dabs,
    You are looking really good :)
    I think this happens with natural hair events, especially where people get all passionate advocating for natural hair. but I agree with you that healthy hair care should be the focus. I get asked that alot at my new salon, and I feel a sense of responsibility to let relaxed and naturals alike know that they need to change how they treat their hair if they want results. Its never really about the products.
    As for the invite, it may have been as a result of bulk messaging but I agree with you that it should have been more balanced.

    Your post def hits all the high notes.

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    1. Thanks Spesh :) I havn't signed up for their newsletter or anything so I doubt that it was bulk messaging but you never know :)

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  11. Dabs, as usual you are 100 percent correct. Hair care is hair care. If you take care of your hair properly, relaxed or natural, it WILL grow! Many people automatically assume being natural gives them the right to look down on relaxed heads. You self you know I'm natural but the way some people take this natural thing ehh. Its infuriating. Some people who r natural still have unhealthy hair. This is an issue that has been over flogged so many times, I dont even know why I'm raising it.
    People need to educate themselves, especially Nigerians

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  12. Hi Dabs, I am sorry you felt left out. From reading your blog, I always tell people that women with healthy relaxed hair take care of their hair just like natural hair women.

    But I would like to point out some things, There are some things relaxed hair people can take for granted, but natural hair people cannot. There are some products that are okay for relaxed hair, but not for natural hair. The shrinkage thing alone is a giant line of demarcation. There are just so many other things I can't even begin to mention, as a lady who has carried both kinds of hair for long, and was successful at both.

    To say that there shouldn't be a line of demarcation is just us not facing reality.

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    1. Hi Anon, I totally acknowledge the differences with the two types of hair but the fact remains that when it comes to actually growing hair from our scalps healthy and long the process is the same as I stated the shrinkage only becomes a factor when its time to style the hair...think about it :)

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  13. Hi Dabs, I'm your official lurker of course. But I just had to comment. You are absolutely right. While I have natural hair now, I read all your archives while relaxed and I have used all the info gotten from you to care for my hair.
    I wonder when all black women will realize that hair is hair. Its all dead protein. Relaxed hair will grow, natural hair will grow if you take care of it properly. I personally think its people with self esteem issues who hide behind the 'natural hair movement. Why am i natural, cos I like afro's, and I can't have that with relaxed hair. I also don't like relaxers, cos I have a sensitive scalp. But of course, I still intend to do a whole lot of things with my hair, such as cut a mohawk, go bald, get a texturiser, put colour in my hair 'as the Spirit leads". Because at the end of the day, it is my hair. it is hair, and it doesn't define my life, it will not take me to heaven, it will not add extra years to my life, it will not end asuu strike, and it will not make me feel better about myself, because I do not need hair to feel better about myself.
    I think we should have a radical meet up, with natural ladies who have nothing against relaxers. smiley face.

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    1. awww thx. hair is hair my dear :)

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    2. @ the comment above: My Sentiments EXACTLY!!!

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  14. Well said Dabs. I don't like the whole team natural, team relaxed divide. People are always shocked when I say my hair is relaxed but so many relaxed women like you and the bloggers you mentioned have proved you can have long and healthy relaxed hair. Natural hair does not automatically equal healthy hair. It's such a common misconception.
    Like you said, hair care is hair care x

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    1. Thanks Les!! so many misconceptions out there...

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  15. I totally agree with you dabs, hair is hair! I am so tired of all this nonsense natural hair groups. I am presently a natural but lately i am really getting angry at all these natural meet ups where they bash relaxed hair as if it is not hair. There should be no natural meet ups or relaxed hair meet ups, it should simply be a hair meet up where healthy hair care tips are given. I recently started running a hair care services and all my clients are relaxed however the techniques i have used on my natural hair over the years is working for their hair too so i really don't see what all the fuss is all about.

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    1. I agree!Thanks for your comment :)

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  16. Hello,
    Please I need your advice or anyone feel free to contribute:) I stopped relaxing my hair May, and my cousin told me it will break, well the front is starting to break. I think because its the toughest part on my head, and i don't put a lot of oils and stuff except hot oil treatment. Every where else is okay. But can I just use the kiddies texture softener just on the hairline, thats the only part. The relaxed bits keep breaking off. My hair is always in a weave so its long but my hairline is the issue. And now i just got this weave done, and i have to straighten the front like every two days, i know its really bad but what do i do? Please help. Sorry if its a long disorganized question. Thanks Rachel

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    1. Hi Anon, you need to start a hair regimen, your hair is breaking because all you did was stop relaxing without systematically attending to your hair's needs, please read this post on building a hair regimen; http://naijahaircangrow.blogspot.com/2011/06/hair-101-build-daily-hair-regimen-today.html

      AND this post on transitioning which is the phase your hair is in now;
      http://naijahaircangrow.blogspot.com/2011/07/how-to-transition-to-natural-hair.html

      Thanks for commenting x

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    2. Thanks for getting back, you're the best.

      Rachel

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    3. You seem to not really have an idea on how hair is grown and lost. For you to complain about a thining hairline and claim to ALWAYS be in a weave,not realize that they are directly related....do some more reading,pls...and be a doer not just a hearer.

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  17. Thanks Ladies for your input and valid points :)

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  18. hi Dabs, i want to find out if you comb your hair immediately after you wash it while damp or you comb after airdrying and doing the moisturing,oiling and sealing

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    1. Hi Ramatu! I must moisturize and seal my hair (usually once when it's damp) before I comb it! Hope I see next month :)

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  19. Preach!! My relaxed hair wouldn't be healthy and long as it is now without your blog, Dabs. When my friends ask what I do to my hair, I tell them. When they question whether it would work on their natural hair, I tell them its the same hair regimen. Now, I'll be saying "hair is hair" :)

    Keep up the good work!

    Elle, Your Kenyan fan

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    1. Thanks girl!! I sent you a mail few weeks ago during the Kenya crisis, hope you are good!

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  20. I feel morally and professionally bound to say my piece about the relaxer and fibroid bit. If that was the only health effect of relaxers on women you found,then I can confidently say we have nothing to fear.
    Even with bad relaxing techniques the only consequence would be a hair/scalp disorder. Uterine fibroids occur in the uterus(obviously)! If someone made such a far fetched observation that some of the toxins would be secreted into the bladder(of which duhhhhh, that's the entire purpose of the kidney- eliminate toxins through urine which the bladder acts as storage for), then in the worst case scenario it would cause a bladder disease not a UTERINE FIBROID! And that is still absolutely ridiculous.lol
    As for cancers, any chemicals are potentially carcinogenic. Toothpaste contains chemicals, maybe we should stop brushing our teeth...smh
    In conclusion, relaxed hair rockers like ME have nothing to fear. Thank you.
    Dabs hun, an Abuja meet up will be totally appreciated,hehehe.mmwah

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    1. Imo, thanks darling for your professional input!! so sound!

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  21. Hi Dabs, I found this a very interesting read. First of all I can only apologize on our behalf and not on that of Felicia for you feeling left out in any way. Felicia specialises in natural hair, although she does have a large number of relaxed clients. Until recently, natural hair advice in Nigeria was in very short supply. The Kinky Apothecary, who organised the event and brought Felicia in, focuses more on providing advice to ladies who are struggling with natural hair. This event was in no way meant to divide or exclude anyone, but rather service the market that required it. As you know full well, since you and I have discussed this in the past (although our feature on relaxed ladies who have find that their hair benefits from a natural hair regimen, us yet to go up, mainly due to time management issues with the blog). Had you spoken to Felicia directly, as a number of ladies who stayed to the end did, you would have quickly realised she is of the same opinion on hair care being hair care, whether natural or relaxed... well, save for a few tweaks such as relaxed hair needing more protein at times. We have a large, and growing number of relaxed customers, however most do eventually make the decision (by themselves, and not through ANY pressure or coersion by us) to begin transitioning to natural hair. Although there is no scientific proof of a link between relaxers and cancer (this was Felicia expressing her opinion, and I wish you had disputed it), it is a fact that there ARE implications to relaxing your hair. I experienced this, the majority of my relaxed customers experienced this. Due to the vibe she received from the people present on the day, these were the people Felicia chose to address with her talk.

    So again, apologies for the fact that you felt excluded from the event. This was not our intention. As you mention you received an email about the event. Additionally, you have been contacted by us in the past, and were emailed by be the week before the event inviting you to take part in a project with us. This was despite me knowing full well that you have relaxed hair.

    If you do come to one of our future events we will go out of our way to ensure you're not made to feel so excluded again.

    Nibi
    The Kinky Apothecary

    PS: shame you didn't come over to say hi, it would have been good to finally meet you after our correspondence.

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    1. Wow, kinky apothecary -sorry I couldn't make it to the event- is there a video on Utube that I can watch of it?
      I have been growing my hair and moisture locking, I mostly conditioner wash only using natural black soap to remove buildup.
      But i noticed my ends are brittle but not breaking- maybe split ends but I don't want to trim, will this be really bad if I leave it? Do you know where I can trim in Abuja?

      I really like the way you twist out your hair- do you have any tutorials on this too?

      Thank you.

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    2. Thanks for Coming here to state your blog's stand; it's is by far more productive if all hair types in focus so everyone benefits at the end of the day. You seemed busy that day, will definitely come over for a chat when we see next.

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  22. Ps: please ignore my shameful typos. I'm yet to fully master this phone! Lol

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  23. Forever Naturalista & Health Conscious18 October 2013 at 18:24

    Are you on crack? Having perused your blog, the depth of information and level of detail provided by Felicia at that event (yeah I was there too) far surpasses anything contained in your entire blog.

    There are several differences between care and maintenance of relaxed and natural hair including how to moisturise and attention paid to the hair cuticle. You thinking the only difference is in how it is "styled" is making me shake off any little confidence previously held in your "expert opinion".

    You should start more sentences with "in my opinion" that way they may be taken with a pinch of salt.

    Yours truly- Forever Naturalista & Health Conscious

    However giving you the benefit of doubt- I may perhaps educate those reading this and reiterate that Felicia specialises in natural hair care. Natural being the optimal word.
    Had you stayed or paid attention, you would have seen her style relaxed hair, and also give health tips for chemically treated hair such as yours.

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    1. Isn't that what American's call relaxer? "Creamy Crack"?

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    2. LAFF Laff Laff! Oui! "Creamey Crack", "Straight Salt", "Fixed Heair" ou soulement "Fixer"

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    3. Dear Forever Naturalista, the insults both overt and implied are not necessary. Everyone is entitled to an opinion. If you disagree with hers, have the decency to express your opposing views in a civil manner.
      The organizer of the event came on here and made clarifications in a respectful and extremely lucid way.
      Take a chill pill ok?
      Light and love, Imo

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    4. AM I ON CRACK? What a childish response! Unfortunately any point you made after that statement- I Didn't read! You definitely are responsible for the term NATURAL NAZI!

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    5. Dabs u shud seriously start thinking of approving comments b4 dey r posted.
      People think the have the right to come on someone's blog and start displaying arrogance and giving insults up and down.
      Please learn to act mature and stop displaying nazi tendencies.
      Smh

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    6. We complain about racism,we complain about male chauvinism.and yet among us black women we try to create more divides.miss aggressively natural,public displays of classlessness is what pulls the world backwards.one's hair is a personal choice whether one keeps it natural,relaxes it, twists it to stretch it or colors it :-* Amy

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    7. This forever naturalista or whatever the heck you call herself, d nerve of you to come on another persons blog and be that disrespectful shows that u must be the one on crack. It's funny because I have seen as many natural unhealthy as I have seen relaxed unhealthy and that is the basis of this particular article. It is all about hair care. People say they are natural implying they have gone " the healthy hair route" but they keep their hair in braids and weaves for weeks unend without moisture, sealing or any kind of maintenance and until the hair recedes from traction then they begin to complain about thinning edges. Do I see this behavior in relaxed haired girls? Yes. Do I also see it in naturalistas? You bet. I think people should Focus on the issue at hand and stop being bitchy and intolerant of other peoples ideas, after all This blogger's "relaxed" hair is healthier than a lot of "naturals" I have ever seen. So humble yourself and learn from someone who obviously has passion for this hair game and knows what she's about, otherwise go find trouble elsewhere!

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    8. NATURAL NAZI..... Looooooool!!!
      You're such a Classy Lady Dabs and so is Madam Nibi of the Kinky Apothecary and all the lovely ladies who stood up for what is right!

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  24. At the end of the day really, everything is a choice. Relaxed or natural. It's sad to see that the natural/relaxed hair divide and bashing that gets people so worked up in the States is slowly seeping through and finding its way here. Having said that, I was at the event and I don't truly remember in any way feeling like relaxed hair was shot down.

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    1. The divide should not exist and that's what's this post is about, I made sure to state the sequence of events that made me feel left out, so while it might not have been shot down, I felt it was ignored but the organizer has cleared things up and it's all good.

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  25. Onto everyone their own! Expressing ones opinion does come at a cost but at the end of the day that's all it is....

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  26. All the 'Natural Nazis' need to stay well away from the comment section on this blog. I really don't see the need for any demarcation. Of course the specifics of a hair care regimen would differ according to the needs of that INDIVIDUALS particular hair type, natural or relaxed. You just have to deal with different issues at differnt points in time. Very soon they'll form castor oil vs olive oil camp. Are you on on crack? Yea she is, creamy crack. And this is one addiction she, and a lot of us, are not willing to let go of. Mscheeeeeeew.
    In other news, Dabs, you won't believe the sheer number of women who feel that the hair growing out of their scalps is not 'pretty'!!! Makes me wonder when the weave culture took over. That's the kinda movement we need to be starting, #teamlovethehairGodgaveyou.

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    1. Wow how sad! Im definitely team #lovethehairGodgaveyouandmake it work and ofcourse team #naijahaircangrow :)

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  27. Hi Dabs, I am sure I am not late to this party. lol. Anyway, I am sure you know I like your blog because of your healthy hair practices,

    I read this post 2 days ago, and decided to get people's opinion first. Anyway, I just want to say that Mane Captain has done a response to your post. You can read it here. http://www.africanaturalistas.com/2013/10/natural-hair-vs-relaxed-hair-should.html

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    1. Interesting... I thought the Mane Captain was the same person as African Naturalistas cos it says so on Mane Captain blog profile

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    2. Koyinsola Vera-Cruz21 October 2013 at 00:46

      I read the response but for some reason I cant put my comment up on the africanaturalistas blog. Anyway my comment is: I think what Dabs meant when she said hair care is hair care is that weather relaxed or straight, taking care of your hair properly will result in healthy hair. I doubt she was trying to say that the same exact regimen will work for both. At the end of the day, the fundamentals are the same. We all wash, DC, moisturise and seal. Of course there are differences in technique and challenges but at the end of the day hair care IS hair care. Take care of your hair and your hair will be healthy. No need to bash relaxers or say unproven facts about them. At the end of the day you put chmicals in your hair too. Cut her some slack and chill on this natural hair voltron behaviour. Its boring.

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    3. Very right. Hair Care is Hair Care. Very important that whatever your hairtype is you CARE for your hair.

      I have my hair natural but i must confess i hate the way so called naturalistas are making this hair thingy seem like a cult following.

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    4. No. Mane Captain is one of the blogger on African Naturalistas.

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  28. Hey lady! It was nice meeting you at the event. I'm going to try to be as diplomatic as possible because while I understand what you're saying about there not being a division, the truth is, there IS a division. We have to face the fact that for a verrrrry long time, natural hair was in the minority. Even now, while it's become trendy and a lot more women are going natural in Nigeria, we are still in the minority. Just for the mere fact that naturals were/are in the minority, it's a given that there are meet ups and events specifically catering to natural hair. It's basically the same thing as Blacks or African Americans grouping together... because they are in the minority. It would be weird to see a White Entertainment Television channel, isn't it? So I would oppose TMC's suggestion of having a Relaxed Hair event.

    In addition, a lot of the hair care practices most of us used while relaxed, that would not fly now that we're natural. For instance, getting hair tools and products specifically made to deal with kinky/coily hair. I don't think people with relaxed hair worry about tangles as much as those with natural hair. It's just a simple fact.

    Granted, there are a lot of healthy hair care practices that apply to both relaxed and natural hair. In fact, I think that because of the rise of natural hair in the past decade, people were forced to start looking at healthy hair care, and this carried over into relaxed hair. This is my opinion o, before somebody will come and abuse me.

    On that note, having meet ups that focus on Healthy Hair as a broad spectrum is a novel idea. You don't really see those around.

    I'm not against relaxed hair, I'm not a natural hair nazi, unlike some people who have commented here. I think hair is hair, most of the time. But there ARE differences that have to be acknowledged. Let me know when your next Salon Day is, so I can attend :)

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  29. Note that she did not say hair is hair, she said hair CARE is hair CARE. From what u said above I'm taking it to mean that as a natural you do have an inferiority complex because u just compared yourself to black people in America being in the minority and how naturals have to group together like its some sort of cult so as to boost your confidence. You oppose relaxed hair meet ups? Comparing it to "white entertainment tv"? Lol. Lady, do you feel inferior? So relaxed people should never talk about their hair in a group because there are more relaxed ladies out there? Are u listening to yourself? Youre talking minority and majority and how majority should keep quiet (like white people) and minotrity should sing their discrimination all over the place (like black people). So this is now a discrimination issue? Lol. Clearly, your issue isn't even that "relaxers are damaging", its more about minority, majority, discrimination and complexes. Hey Lady, please sit down. Hair might no be hair but hair CARE is hair CARE

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    1. YOU brought up discrimination, not me. Minorities are a FACT of life. So because people with similar features choose to form a group, they're automatically in cults? You're obviously the one with a complex who knows absolutely nothing about the way human beings relate. I suggest you read a little bit about Sociology or Anthropology.

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    2. Minorities who don't feel discriminated against don't feel the need to form groups and also suggest that those in the majority shouldn't form theirs. It's oppression that makes one think that way. Clearly you feel oppressed. Oppression comes from discrimination. Let's bear in mind that the measure of the minority is not necessarily numerical. The minority is the group that feels discriminated against. Calling naturals a minority and suggesting the relaxed shouldn't have groups are elements of discrimination. If u know anything about anthropology or discrimination law (like I actually do!) then u should have even a slight understanding how it can be inferred from what you said that you feel discriminated against. Ps: A cult is just a close group of people or things. Lady, think about it.

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    3. Berry Dakara only stated what was true. as a natural i get a lot of questions and funny looks, i have no support from family or friends and most times i just want to go back to my relaxer days. these meet ups are there to encourage us to keep doing what we are doing and enjoy our natural beautiful curls despite what the world says, like Berry says, if u know anything about sociology you'll understand that the weak stand in groups to protect themselves and present a strong front. the meetups are not only about hair care but to encourage naturals to remain so.. relaxed ladies don't need such encouragement cos it is "normal" in our society to be relaxed.also haircare is not the same for natural hair in terms of products and tools, i completely disagree with dabs on this cos i have natural hair and when i transitioned i was using the same products i was using as a relaxed head and ended up with hard unmanageable hair. its not a market gimmick, some products are good for relaxed hair and some are good for natural hair. please try to understand what Berry is saying and don't be rude for the sake of being rude, its unladylike... really

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    4. Lol @ whatevzz as a comeback!!! Again, YOU brought in "oppression" not me. I suppose all the cultural student organizations (oh wait, I mean cults) across universities all over the world are oppressed because they come together to meet based on similarities, and largely being minor groups at school. Okay o. I hear you loud and clear!

      Oh, and without even talking about the topic at hand, you have been quite rude and disrespectful. But I'm sure you know that already, conveniently hiding behind an Anonymous tag.

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  30. Hey Dabs

    I'm sorry you felt excluded, but it was a natural hair event, as part of the "Natural Hair Month" celebration pioneered by The Kinky Apothecary, and so it's no surprise that relaxed hair was not really discussed.

    Not many relaxed women in Nigeria know how to care for their hair so I'd love to see more Relaxed hair meet-ups like the one you've started at the salon.

    There are so many studies in the world that conflict each other and the Relaxer & cancer debate is one of them. You've chosen which side to believe, and other people have chosen to believe the opposite.

    I personally believe good hair is healthy hair- natural or relaxed. And GENERALLY speaking, hair care is hair care.

    Maybe Ms. Leatherwood didn't go into the nitty gritty because she didn't want to overwhelm people with information, but if we want to go into the specifics, look closely into hair science, you'll see our hair is different. I can't comb the way you comb. My texture is different. Our hair porosity may be different. Moisturising the same way you do, or my best friend does, may not work for me. Even amongst naturals, we cannot all care for our hair the same! We have different curl patterns and porosity and texture and density to consider.

    What I'm really trying to say is, there are differences. This isn't a bad thing, it's just a fact.

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  31. Nice post! Once you make sure the oil is not too hot for your hands or scalp, divide your hair into segments on top of your hand and take the oil and massage it into your scalp in circular motions. This promotes blood flow and circulation and also helps to make your scalp stronger.
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  32. Having read all the comments, all I can say is, WOMEN HAVE SERIOUS, infact, VERY SERIOUS ISSUES. God help you.
    Can't you all just accept each other the way you are? Must you bash each other. Haven't you heard the idiom,'to each his own'?
    Now, away from the Natural Nazis or Relaxer advocates, can't you just overlook flimsy things like what hairstyle another woman carries, which hair texture is superior e.t.c.? I can sense insecurity in many comments. Why can't you just love yourself the way you are.
    Habatically, it is well with una o. I am a woman too but I refuse to entwine myself in silly things we do sometimes. Tufiakwa!

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  33. This is really interesting take on the concept.I never thought of it that way. I came across this site recently which I think it will be a great use of new ideas and informations. Thank you for sharing it with us.


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