10 THINGS; I HATE ABOUT MY NAIJA SALON
Hiya, so I have decided to start a segment called 10 THINGS! Once in a while I will post 10THINGS about a certain topic. Today's topic is just my sarcastic way of listing the things that go wrong at salons here in Naija most of which I have already addressed. Enjoy!!
I love to pamper myself every so often and in the past part of this self pampering included frequent trips to the salon to get my hair washed or steamed or curled. Well these days, things have changed! I only visit the salon when I absolutely have to. Each time, I go with my bag of expectations only to return home with it deflated. Deflated because in the course of my visit I would have almost blurted out at least 10 things I hate about my visit! I am sure your initial reaction to this topic is that it sounds too harsh or critical but by the time I’m done listing these ten things, I have a feeling you will be nodding your head in agreement.
<!--[if !supportLists]-->1. <!--[endif]-->First off, madam stylist, I hate that you have brought that ‘white now turned brown towel’ to use on my hair and that the one on my shoulder is frayed and has holes on it; with all the money being spent here, you’d think that these towels should have been replaced with new ones by now or should I bring a towel from my house next time?
<!--[if !supportLists]-->2.
Okay,so you say I have split ends and I need a trim but why have you given me a hair cut! Did my ends split to my roots? I hate that I can no longer use the ponytail ruffle I had on my hair when I walked into the salon because I now have no ponytail!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->3.
I hate that you are constantly shoving this your concocted ointment in my face and telling me it is the answer to all my hair woes, please let me make the decision myself.
<!--[if !supportLists]-->4.
<!--[endif]--> How dare you apply relaxer to the ends of my hair!! That part is already relaxed, if you read the relaxer box or went to a proper beauty school you would know that all you are doing is destroying my hair!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->5.
<!--[endif]--> I hate that you have now abandoned me for 45minutes because I told you my scalp is not itching! I know you want to have lunch but don’t you think it can wait till after my hair has been washed!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->6.
<!--[endif]--> Why are you using the smallest tooth comb on my thick coarse hair, pulling lumps of it out in the name of combing! What happened to the wide tooth comb on the counter!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->7.
<!--[endif]-->I know your ‘customer’ just walked in and you can’t wait to get your hands on her hair but I hate that you want to wash out the deep conditioner on my hair barely two minutes after you put it on! It needs time to penetrate deep into my hair as the name implies!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->8.
<!--[endif]-->I hate that I am sweating profusely and my ear lobes are bright red and sting so bad but you are insisting that my rock hard hair is yet to be dry under this your hooded dryer so that you can buy time to finish relaxing your ‘customer’s’ hair! Who sent you to start in the first place!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->9.
<!--[endif]--> I hate that I forgot to bring my own ceramic hair straightener with me because the one you are using on my hair has no more ceramic coating and is literally frying my hair and even with all the smoke you still want to go over my strands five times!!
<!--[if !supportLists]-->10.
<!--[endif]--> I hate that you expect a tip from me even after the torment you have put me through! I thought people give tips for a job well done; do you really in your heart believe that you deserve a tip right now?
So you see, for fear of blurting out any of these 10things and risk starting a fight, I have consciously kept the salon visits to the minimum and learnt to do the basic things my hair needs myself however, for salon standards in Naija to improve it’s up to customers to speak up (maybe not in my exact words) and correct stylists when they are engaging in bad practices rather than mumble under your breath and vow never to return because in all honesty, the next salon you go to will have stylists doing the same annoying things.
Stop by soon,
Dabs
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